I feel rather upset... why is it life is sooo brittle... Today one of my patients under my care passed away. Although she was quite weak and ill looking I was really not expecting her to pass away, or at least not to pass away during my shift... When my junior told me, that the patient was unarousable, I faster put down all my things and ran to the patient trying to wake her up... Then the staff nurse in charge of me, Xu Yi told me to get a grip on myself and my job was to inform the doctor... After that I still had to continue on with my job and serve my afternoon meds... as if nothing had happened. As today was rather busy, Xu Yi helped me handle the death procedures as it was already time to pass report and i still had quite alot of stuff to do. Sometimes I wonder whether I am improving or not...
And today i got scolded quite alot of times. Mostly due to my carelessness... I now have the fear of handling controlled drugs. I feel that whenever i handle them, something is bound to happen... Haiz...
After work I went for my induction programme retest and this time i got 28 out of 30 which is a vast improvement from last time it was only 16 out of 30. Well... My studying did not go down the drain.... haha...
But another bad news arrived when I was finishing the test. The Nokia shop called and said my handphone parts had been corroded by the carrot juice and its unrepairable... so they asked me to come collect the phone to say my last good bye. haha.... looks i have to go around hunting for a new phone...
After the test i went for the oncology support group meeting conducted by sister lian... then she asked me to join and be involved in planning activities... But i really dunno about that...
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